1. |
||||
What are we reaching for?
The golden circle
What are we reaching for?
The golden circle
The golden circle of what?
The golden circle of floating perfection
|
||||
2. |
||||
You think my brain is cracked? ‘Cause my movements are tracked
By the CIA. You know they’re gonna extract
All my thoughts, and when they get ‘em, I’m gonna get whacked
It's a goddamn shame, but it’s a goddamn fact
Then the sand creatures come with their big rubber skins
With that cork in their belly, gonna hold the sand in
They kinda look human, ‘til you unplug the hole
Sand pours out, skin deflates, then fills back up with your soul
You think this country’s safe? One nation indivisible?
Just wait until China goes and turns itself invisible!
Don’t give me that shit! This is for real, you can’t contain it!
Have you watched their credit rating rise? How else can you explain it?
I’m speaking the truth man! Don’t you doubt me, don’t you scold me!
I know it’s all true, ‘cause that Pignocerous told me!
Don’t want his protection? Go ahead and be dead!
Don’t come running to me when they repurpose your head!
Got no comfort to loan ya
No one gonna phone ya
Nobody’s got the brass
Except for Pignocerous of Spleebonia
He's a pig man with a rhinocerASS
He’s gonna kill all the bastards
No one does it faster
We’ll be forever in his debt
We’ll let him call himself our lord and master
‘Cause he’ll save us from these VERY REAL THREATS
|
||||
3. |
I Haz a Sad
02:48
|
|||
I haz a sad, the saddest I’se had
The world is so bad it gave me a sad
I ain’t gettin’ mad, come on down to my pad
Can ya give me a glad to stave off my sad
But don’t show me puppies
They’ll just make me cry
And don’t show me flowers
They’ll wither and die
And don’t show me beauty
It just takes my breath
And don’t show me life
It all ends in death
‘Cause I haz a sad, the saddest I’se had
The world is so bad it gave me a sad
It’s driving me mad, all alone in my pad
I’m fighting the glad, holdin’ on to my sad
Just don’t try to fix it
I doubt that can work
And don’t try to change it
I’ll act like a jerk
I know you can’t take away
my doubts and my fears
But thank you for coming
I just need you here
‘Cause I haz a sad, the saddest I’se had
The world is so bad it gave me a sad
I ain’t gettin’ mad, you’se down at my pad
I can gaze at your glad and ride out my sad
While I haz a sad
Yes I haz a sad
|
||||
4. |
||||
Do you seek adventure? Let adventure take you away
Join me on a journey. Let the journey start today
Will you start existing? Embracing the whole human race
Start this adventure by putting something on your face
|
||||
5. |
My Monocle
03:32
|
|||
This is my monocle
It makes me look so sophisticated
My monocle
I’m so fashionably outdated
Stare into your soul with the complete protection of a little hole filled with glass. Yeah I got class and so much sass, you see, I see you seeing me see you and so on. Don’t you see I see so clearly
With My Monocle
My Gentleman’s Single-Use Unlubricated Monocle
This is my monocle
It makes me feel so elegant
My Monocle
Makes one of my eyes relevant
Like Mr Peanut, Colonel Klink, The Count, and Karl Marx, The Penguin parks his glassy circle on that eyeball, drinks his highball, lookin’ dapper. Got a flapper on each arm. I’ll do no harm, you see I see all. Let the chips fall where they must! Monocle or bust!
My Monocle
My Gentleman’s Single-Use Unlubricated Monocle
What makes a teacher professorial? Monocle!
What makes a colleague conspiratorial? Monocle!
What’s makes a dashingly fine pictorial? Monocle!
What fashion lives for time immemorial?
Stare into your soul with the complete protection of a little hole filled with glass. Yeah I got class and so much sass, you see, I see you seeing me see you and so on. Don’t you see I see so clearly
Just Like Mr Peanut, Colonel Klink, The Count, and Karl Marx, The Penguin parks his glassy circle on that eyeball, drinks his highball, lookin’ dapper. Got a flapper on each arm. I’ll do no harm, you see I see all. Let the chips fall where they must! Monocle or bust!
|
||||
6. |
That’s an E
00:12
|
|||
That's an E
That's an E
Not that kind of party
Not that kind of party
Not that kind of party
Not that kind of party
|
||||
7. |
||||
There was a nice little picnic. Grill going. People layin’ on the lawn
I saw you floatin’ by, tried to catch your eye, then you was gone
But look out! I Caught you shootin’ that smile at me and lookin’ so fine!
I shot my smile back at you, happy, ‘cause I know you’re mine
And I could take you and grab you with my arms around you
Make sweet, sweet love on the cool soft ground
You and me, buck nekkid, doing things to astound
The world with our passion and the crazy sounds
of our love, earth shaking, earth shattering. BOOM!
Explosions of force that could clear any room
But outside all of nature is there, I don’t care
let ‘em stare, we’re no place and everywhere
But It’s not that kind of party
No it’s not that kind of party
It’s like takin’ a cat to a dog fight. It’s not that kind of party
It’s like makin’ a left when it’s so right. It’s not that kind of party
No it’s not that kind of party
There was a big ole happening at the rock and roll show
They was a rockin’ and they was a rollin’ and the joint was gonna blow
But these thoughts flow into our heads with music and magic in the air
That we can toss our inhibitions - let everybody turn and stare
And our arms could lock as our bodies engage
And make sweet, sweet love on the warm hard stage
You and me, buck nekkid, doing things to enrage
The world with our passion, start a war they wage
On our love, earth shaking, earth shattering. BOOM!
Explosions of force that could clear any room
All around concert-goers are there, I don’t care
let ‘em stare, we’re no place and everywhere
But It’s not that kind of party
No it’s not that kind of party
It’s like growin’ some corn in a wheat patch. It’s not that kind of party
It’s like causin’ an itch that you can’t scratch. It’s not that kind of party
No it’s not that kind of party
The courtroom was packed, It was the trial of the century
CNN, MSNBC, and Fox News had it all on the TV
There were lots of pundits pontificating and witnesses crying
But If I said I didn’t want you then and there, you know I would be lying
Bodies fly through the air, I don’t care where we land
We’d make sweet, sweet love on the witness stand
You and me, buck nekkid, doing things that are banned
‘Round the world, which our passion has at the command
of our love, earth shaking, earth shattering. BOOM!
Explosions of force that could clear any room
Bailiffs drag us away by our hair, I don’t care
let ‘em stare, we’re no place and everywhere
But It’s not that kind of party
No it’s not that kind of party
It’s like hockin’ a loogie at the opera. It’s not that kind of party
Or poppin’ pills with Deepak Chopra. It’s not that kind of party
It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife. It’s not that kind of party
It's meeting the man of my dreams, and then meeting his beautiful wife. It’s not that kind of party
No It’s not that kind of party. It’s not that kind of party.
No It’s not that kind of party. It’s not that kind of party.
No It’s not that kind of party. It’s not that kind of party.
It’s not that kind of party.
|
||||
8. |
||||
I was feeling done in, couldn't win
I'd only ever kissed before.
(You mean she? Uh huh.)
I thought there's no use getting into heavy petting
It only leads to trouble and seat wetting...
Now all I want to know is how to go
I've tasted blood and I want more
(More, more, more)
I'll put up no resistance, I want to stay the distance
I've got an itch to scratch, I need assistance:
Toucha toucha toucha touch me, I wanna be dirty
Thrill me chill me fulfil me
Creature of the night.
Then if anything grows while you pose
I'll oil you up and rub you down
(Down, down, down)
And that's just one small fraction of the main attraction
You need a friendly hand and I need action...
Toucha toucha toucha touch me, I wanna be dirty
Thrill me chill me fulfil me
Creature of the night.
(Toucha toucha toucha touch me, I wanna be dirty
Thrill me chill me fulfil me
Creature of the night.)
Toucha toucha toucha touch me, I wanna be dirty
Thrill me chill me fulfil me
Creature of the night.
(Creature of the night x7)
Creature of the night
|
||||
9. |
||||
Do you seek adventure? YES! Let adventure take you away
Join me on a journey. OKAY! Let the journey start today
Will you start loving? SURE! The best adventure I’ve heard of
HOW DO WE START? Simply Start this adventure by accepting truest love
|
||||
10. |
Holy Shit, You Love Me
02:45
|
|||
Sometimes the world is overwhelming and I want to disappear
But, holy shit -- you love me.
Sometimes everything seems meaningless and I don’t know why I’m here
But, holy shit -- you love me.
You are the soft place where I fall
The one keeps me right on track
And I doubt you’ll ever comprehend how much I love you back
Sometimes I cry when I should laugh. Sometimes I mope when I should grin
But holy shit -- you love me.
Sometimes I can’t appreciate how fucking great my life has been
But, holy shit -- you love me.
You are the reason I go on
You keep everything in scale
You are the reason I know nothing that I do can ever fail
(Full verse, whistled)
Sometimes I get everything wrong, sometimes I think I really suck
But holy shit -- you love me.
Sometimes I look around and can’t believe I’m blessed with so much luck.
‘Cause holy shit -- you love me.
Yeah, holy shit -- you love me.
Holy shit -- you love me.
|
||||
11. |
||||
Cthulhu! Cthulu! Cthulu! Cthulhu!
He’s big, He’s scary
He’s squishy, He’s scaly
But if you say he’s not sexy, you’re a dunce
his face fills 27 holes at once.
Cthulhu! Cthulu! Cthulhu! Cthulu!
He’s ugly! to behold!
And he’s really, really, really old
That is not dead which can eternal lie,
And with strange aeons even death may die
(chorus)
He lies asleep where that city slid
He’ll rule again like he once did
Now his body waits where the water hid
That Cthulu’s head is a great big squid
Cthulhu! Cthulu! Cthulhu! Cthulu!
He’s worshiped! He’s feared!
He’s got squishy dreadlocks for a beard!
Dance around in your cult, in your head he’s beaming
“In his house at R'lyeh dead Cthulhu waits dreaming”
(chorus)
Cthulhu! Cthulu! Cthulhu! Cthulu!
He’s filling your head with screams!
He’s haunting all your dreams!
Grab his head with an army of a million troops
And make calamari the size of hula hoops
(chorus)
|
||||
12. |
Take My Rock and Like It
01:46
|
|||
You wanna rock? I got your rock. You’ll take my rock and like it
If you wanted games, I’d give you games, I’d say take this ball and spike it
If you wanna ride up mountains, I’ll say take this hill and bike it
But you wanna rock, I got your rock. You’ll take my rock and like it
Ooh Wee! Gonna rock
Good Golly! Crazy talk
Now the rock’s in your head, gonna rock ‘til your dead
Then rock some more with A Halo Called Fred
You wanna groove to funky soul, so take my rock and like it
You wanna burn the joint down, gonna take this match and strike it
You want the loudest voice, I’m gonna scream and shout and mike it
And you wanna rock, I got your rock. You’ll take my rock and like it
You wanna live, you wanna love, so take my rock and like it
You wanna give the world a shot so pick your path and hike it
When fate keeps giving you the guff, gotta sit back and outpsych it
But you wanna rock, I got your rock. You’ll take my rock and like it
Ooh Wee! Gonna groove
Boy Howdy! Play it smooth
Now the rock’s in your soul, and you’re out of control
‘Cause A Halo Called Fred gots the Rock-n-Roll
You wanna rock? I got your rock. You’ll take my rock and like it
You wanna rock? I got your rock. You’ll take my rock and like it
You wanna rock? I got your rock. You’ll take my rock and like it
You wanna rock? I got your rock. You’ll take my rock and like it
|
||||
13. |
||||
14. |
Suck My Haircut
01:41
|
|||
I hate school
I like drugs
I have no job
Safe sex sucks
oh, ya
Suck my hairciut
oh, ya
Suck my hairciut
My clothes are ripped
My car is junk
Can I sleep on your floor?
I’m still drunk
oh, ya
Suck my hairciut
oh, ya
Suck my hairciut
(instrumental)
1 2 3 4!
I hate school!
I like drugs!
I have no job!
Safe sex sucks!
|
||||
15. |
Previously...
00:33
|
|||
1, 2, 3, 4...
Number 9...
I was in the middle of a rousing game of Pac-Man...
Boingy boingy...
La la la...
Ralph...
La la la...
Leonard Bernstein...
La la la linoleum...
By flea driven Zamboni...
And it hurts ow ow ow...
My Sharona...
Aliens are flying inside my head...
|
||||
16. |
Aliens Part II
03:12
|
|||
17. |
||||
Let's just sing about gravy
Gravy
There's the line
And this time, I didn't forget the gravy
It makes its own sauce
Great Gravy
On my fries
The ladle is in your mind
On my fries
In your mind
I'll just tell ya, I love making gravy
Gravy's awesome
There's something so satisfying when you make a roux and then it thickens up that bubbly... oh...
A Halo Called Gravy
It's like alchemy, man
You and your Alton Brown bow tie
It is alchemy
It's practical real world alchemy
It's better living through chemistry
I could go for a good bowl of gravy right now
I could go for a good bowl of gravy right now
I am a good bowl of gravy
I could go for you right now
Big bowl of gravy
I want to consume you Brushwood
Gravy is there to be consumed
I want to dip you
I want to dip my fries into you
Everyone dip the gravy
You know what'd be better to dip into gravy than fries though?
What?
Gravy
Are you saying that gravy should be eaten with gravy dipped as gravy?
That's right
We could get a real thick gravy and you freeze it solid
Or even like sometimes the way in congeals at room temperature
And you cut out little dippable chunks
And dip 'em in the nice hot gravy
So that the old gravy melts into the new gravy
And the new gravy sticks to the old gravy
Ebony and Ivory
White gravy and brown gravy
Yeah, imagine that, a nice thick country white gravy dipped into a good oogy brown gravy with all those burnt... ooohhh...
There's a lot of people who have imagined that over the years
With biscuits
Biscuits and gravy
WIth some biscuits. Mmmmmmmm
Sop it up with a biscuit
So how about if you took gravy as your biscuit base
And just put in enough flour just to thicken it enough to call it a biscuit and then dipped that in gravy?
That'd be a Gravy Biscuit Dipped in Gravy
|
||||
18. |
||||
When the plague wipes out humanity and there’s almost no one left
Will you still be there beside me ‘til we draw our final breath?
Will you take my hand in yours and slash each zombie that we see?
And when we get back to our hideout, will your heart still belong to me?
Will you gaze into my eyes like I’m the only one around
When the post apocalyptic nightmare really gets us down?
When the flesh of everyone we know all melts off of their bones
And we’re hiding from the army of killer alien clones
Will you hold me close each time those doomsday bombs give off a blast?
Will you still be mine for all of time, however long that lasts?
Will you gaze into my eyes like I’m the only one around
When the post apocalyptic nightmare really gets us down?
So let’s fight the flying monkeys, flee the evil poison gas
As the world goes up in flames, and we can see it’s burning fast
We’ll behead the mutant sewer people, crush each vampire bee
By moonlight as the moon comes crashing down into the sea
I will gaze into your eyes like you’re the only one around
When the post-apocalyptic nightmare really gets us down
|
||||
19. |
It’s All Aces Baby
02:04
|
|||
Get it on, now!
It’s all aces baby, you can have your cake and eat it too
It’s all aces baby, you can gobble it up and then when you’re through
Your cake is gone but your cake is there
Let me lick that icing out your hair
It’s all aces baby, All aces baby, All aces baby, baby, baby!
It’s all aces baby, you can have a wash but not get wet
It’s all aces baby, I don’t care how stinkin’ filthy you get
Your body’s clean but you’re dry as a bone
Let me dirty it up when I get home
It’s all aces baby, All aces baby, All aces baby, baby, baby!
Someone once told me that the grass is greener on the other farm
Don’t know how much of that is true
So I’ll sleep in the barn that keeps me warm
Break it down Brushwood!
Break it down Queenie!
Break it down Tiny!
Break it down Halo!
It’s all aces baby
All aces baby
All aces baby, baby, baby!
Someone once told me got to walk a mile in another’s shoes
But my feet are tired, I’ll just lay down
And you can tell me all about it while you ease my blues
Bring it home now...
It’s all aces baby, you can eat your fish without catchin’ it first
It’s all aces baby, watch it jump in the boat when the damn gets burst
That fish is out, now that fish is in
Gonna gobble it up to absolve my sin
It’s all aces baby, All aces baby, All aces baby, baby, baby!
All aces baby, baby, baby!
All aces baby, baby, baby!
|
||||
20. |
||||
Do you seek adventure? YES! Let adventure take you away
Join me on a journey. OKAY! Let the journey start today
Will you start living? SURE! That means alive. As in not dead
HOW DO WE START? Start this adventure by putting something on your head
|
||||
21. |
||||
It’s the Murple’s magic hat - Best Christmas Gift Ever
The Murple’s magic hat - Best Christmas Gift Ever
It’ll start you out like that on the Best Christmas Ever
It’ll take you where you want to go
‘Cause the Murple’s magic hat - Best Christmas Gift Ever
It’s a super magic hat - Best Christmas Gift Ever
But the story of how I got that hat
is one nobody knows
It all starts out on a cold and lonely Christmas
With a psychic distress call from Dimension 7B
From the planet Garinthium with the deadly crawling cacti
And the nicest purple jungles that you ever did see
The food is pretty good, but eat it before it eats you
A fight with a peach one time ripped off my left arm
I’m glad I was near the skin regenerating plant!
It’s awesome that they have it, ‘cause it helps to heal the harm
So we get this distress call, and get sucked through a portal
Seven dragons have the Murple held hostage in the sky
They wanna harvest his solid gold fur for all eternity
Which is very sad and cruel -- So therefore they must die!
But how to kill the dragons? We didn’t bring our swords!
Gotta go and find the Pleebles, with their magical teeth
They hate dragons. Their incisors like to grind them down to stone
They shoot them from their mouths, so they get buried underneath
It’s easy to convince them -- We extract our human love
and they turn it into liquid, and they drink it with no fuss
So loves saves the day - just don’t question how they mate there
It’s really, really ugly but they say the same of us
The epic battle’s starting - Bring it on PEW, PEW, PEW!
flying teeth are everywhere! CHOP, CHOP, CHOP!
And ROAR, that’s the dragon, and SLURP the liquid love
And OW MY EYE! The Dragon got it! Oh lord, make it stop!
(CHORUS, ending with is one hardly anybody knows)
Damn dragons and their dangerous mind melting acid
It’s only cured by berries that are way, way underground
We can liquify and melt ourselves, I think that’s easier
Sometimes you lose a foot but you can still be safe and sound
‘Cause I grabbed some extra feet from the foot tree. Got to feed
Those foot munching demons by the berries where they stand
LOOK OUT!!! INCOMING!!! Oooh no! I think they got me!
it's all going dark! I see you hold out your hand
But it won’t stay still! Now it swirls before my eyes
And now the dragon eating octopus comes, but he’ll be trapped
In the Pleeble tooth cross-fire! I can’t bear to watch!
Good thing I’m losing consciousness-- My life force almost sapped...
I can't tell my body parts apart anymore.
I try to close my eye, I can still see through the hole
where my eyelid forgot to uniquify itself
Oh the lights, oh the lights, oh they’re swirling in my soul
Now the octopus is taking out each dragon one by one
With its poison mind darts. They psychically emit
Waves to heal my broken body as each dragon is defeated
But it ain’t over yet! OH NO! WE’VE BEEN HIT!
Their fire makes me sing stupid ‘80s songs. Must fight it
The only way we can, with ironic cover versions
"Give me one moment in time..." OH NO! I can’t stop
but you can help me out by singing “Like a Surgeon!”
(CHORUS, ending with is one you’ll soon know)
For our next secret weapon we sing some Blondie covers
The dragons start crumbling, ‘cause Blondie never fails
Then poetry! Shel Silverstein and Shakespeare flyin’
The Man from Nantucket makes them crumble into scales
But the scales are so heavy, it’s crushing our portal
There’s no way out! Here we stand with mouths agape
We’re stuck here for life, with all the jungles and the monsters!
At least we saved the Murple, although WE can’t escape
Be free little Murple! What’s that you gave us?
Teleporting hats from your golden fur, so strong?
BEST CHRISTMAS GIFT EVER! And all because we saved him
So we promised to immortalize the Murple in a song...
(CHORUS, ending with is one you now know)
Best Christmas Gift Ever!
Ho Ho Ho!
Best Christmas Gift Ever!
|
||||
22. |
This Will Not End Well
02:48
|
|||
Old Honey Badger was sad one morning
‘Til the magical ferret saved the day
And zapped away every one of his troubles
And made his pain go away
This will not end well - This will not end well
Honey Badger was filled with so much magic
He climbed to the highest cliff to yell
To tell the world the truth and all of the answers
Did he have a story to tell!
This will not end well - This will not end well
But no one was there to hear his story
But good old Honey Badger would not be deterred
The cliff wasn’t high enough, but he could go higher
‘Cause the magic ferret’s wisdom had to be heard
So he gathered the garbage from all the forest
Made a teetering pile up to the sky
He stood so proud and tall and majestic
He wobbled up there so high
This will not end well - This will not end well
But none of the creatures of the forest could hear him
So he got their attention by punching their moms
And he built a megaphone from a fork in a toaster
And powered it with nuclear bombs
This will not end well - This will not end well
And just to make sure everybody could hear him
He smoked some meth and carved a bigger mouth on his face
Mustered up courage by selling his soul to Satan
Them he shouted his message all over the place
All the creatures heard the message and all were happy
Honey Badger's joy was second to none
‘Til Magic ferret said to Honey Badger,
"I'm leaving. My work is done"
This will not end well - This will not end well
This will not end well - This will not end well
This will not end well - This will not end...
|
||||
23. |
||||
In the long dark teatime of the soul
I wait and I wait and I wait and I wait
Through an immortal lifetime without parole
In the years between the endless souls who come
And endless souls who go back where they’re from
And nothing can fill that empty feeling
Not even a really good cup of darjeeling
So I wait and I wait and I wait and I wait
And I wait and I wait and I wait and I wait
In the long dark teatime of the soul
In the long dark teatime of the soul
I remember that I once remembered that I
lost your memory down the old memory hole
You were everything once and you’re everything still
At least I think you were. I’ll think back until
I break through the shell put there year by year
Through eternal numbness, ‘til a single tear
can remind me that I once remembered a time
Where I remembered a time where I remembered a time
Before the long dark teatime of the soul
In the long dark teatime of the soul
I wait and I wait and I wait and I wait
For something time once stole
And I think you were here, before my long dark tea time
Forever is forever and there’s so much free time
I remember some happiness, our love was rife. Time
Caught up tho, it only was a single lifetime
So I wait and I wait and I wait and I wait
And I wait and I wait and I wait and I wait
In the long dark teatime of the soul
In the long dark teatime of the soul
In the long dark teatime of the soul
In the long dark teatime of the soul
|
||||
24. |
||||
Do you seek adventure? Now that adventure took you away
We took a journey. And that journey started today
Wanna do it all over? To be sure you’ll remember when
Start this adventure by listening to this album again
|
A Halo Called Fred New Brunswick, New Jersey
The finest guitar, bass, violin, and Tupperware band in all of time and space, geek-rock legends for over 25 years.
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